First Day of School: Preparing the Kids
Wednesday, August 11th, 2010This ain’t my first rodeo. I’ve been watching poorly dressed men hide behind barrels some twenty years now. If you don’t get that reference, then, I guess, it IS your first. So, here are some tips.
Get them ready the night before – Most parenting sites have this tip. Pick out their clothes the night before. If you want to be truly awesome, DRESS them the night before. Why go thru the hassle of a wardrobe change at 7:00 a.m. when you can can completely eliminate it. This will give the kids five more minutes of sleep, and I think we can all agree how important sleep is.
Feed them. Or don’t. I’ve had 24 kids. Some eat in the morning. Some don’t. They all should, you can lead a horse to water and all. You want to make your morning truly enjoyable (a total living hell) get into a power struggle with a five year old about the amount of milk there is or isn’t in a bowl of Cheerio’s. #lose #lose
School supplies. They should have some. Unsure of what to get? Things to write with. Things to write on. Maybe some glue. If you feeling particularly self important get a binder. I’ve discovered that it doesn’t matter what you send that first day, they always come home with a list, or 15 of things that are also needed. I take advantage of the fact that everyone else is home filling out 72 pages of “who can pick up my kid” type paperwork and go hit the stores after I get the addendum’s. Plus, everything is on sale so I buy two and am prepared for next year. (as far as you know)
Get them to bed at a reasonable time.
Who am I?
God?
Can I perform miracles? No. Plus, if they have to fall asleep during math a couple of times to learn that sleep is important, so be it. If they get left behind, not my problem. I am quite comfortable with the fact that some kids do need to be left behind, maybe even mine. Let’s be honest now, someone is holding your kid back, you know it. Your little Susie is not that stupid.
Pack them a nutritious lunch. Or if you live in my town, don’t. I’m still begging Jamie Oliver to come to our town, which is the fattest city in America. I have a bit of foodie crush on him, and after having been stuck in London during the Volcano thingy earlier this spring, Tech Support may not ever take me back. Let’s pause a moment while I drool over the bruschetta again.
Expect the worst. They may not miss you. You’ll be fine. Just think about how much cleaning you can get done when they aren’t following behind you squishing blueberries and chocolate into the berber.






